Respect and consent are not negotiable

Addressing respect and consent in schools

From time to time, we face challenges as schools that require our immediate attention, in order to give the matter the gravitas it duly deserves.

In 1964, an American woman Kitty Genovese was raped and stabbed to death over a 40-minute period – an event heard and witness by almost 40 people. Why am I telling you this? It is because the concept of the 'bystander effect' or intervention became part of our language from 1968 due to this event. A bystander is a person who is present but not taking part in a situation or event. In 1964, bystanders assumed that someone else would intervene or simply did not wish to get involved. In speaking to you today, there is a danger that you may assume my message applies to someone else; that it has nothing to do with you and that the solution to any problem must lie with someone else. My message applies to all of us in the Dickinson Centre today.

Over the last week or so, you may have heard about a young university student who asked a very simple online question. "Have you or has anyone close to you experienced sexual assault from someone who went to an all-boys school? Yes or no." People were encouraged to respond by uploading their experiences to an online petition. 

While the initial question focused on Independent boys' schools, the responses involved students from single gender and co-educational schools, and from the three educational sectors, Independent, Catholic and Government.

The petition drew thousands of powerful testimonies from many young women. The feedback is both disturbing and the content is an indictment on societal decency. Hundreds of young women have come forward with confronting testimonials of sexual assault and rape by young men.

Furthermore, there have been examples in Federal Parliament of alleged inappropriate adult behaviour, both physical and verbal, including assault.

At the core of the above issue are two keywords that we must consider if we are to ensure that, at Scotch, we can make a real difference to society.

These two words are 'respect' and 'consent'. Respect meaning a feeling of deep admiration for someone or something elicited by their abilities, qualities, or achievements, and having due regard for someone's feelings, wishes, or rights; and consent meaning permission for something to happen or agreement to do something.

These words are critical to who we are at Scotch, and how we must act and respond to others. As an all-boys school this especially applies towards women, but it also applies to a boy's interaction with other boys, whether it be at school or out of school. Same-sex relationships demand the same standard of ethical behaviour.

We can always do things better at Scotch and we should always aim to be the best we can be. This includes me.

In commencing today's Assembly, Rev Gary spoke to us about our most significant role model, Jesus Christ. The stories of Jesus in the Bible and his positive and counter-cultural interactions with women – compared to how other men treated women at that time – is a poignant example of the standards we must set ourselves.

In your world, one source of damage to respect and consent is via your digital usage and what I will call your digital footprint. As soon as you go online you start creating a trail of information about you. This is your digital footprint. Your digital footprint, especially what you say and do on social media, shapes what people think of you, now and in the future. Your own children might even look at it one day. There is a very simple question to ask yourself: would you show what you are about to publish or send across the digital environment to your sister, mother or grandma? If you have the smallest level of doubt, then stop. Your digital footprint does not just affect you; it can affect what people think about your community too, in this case Scotch and your family. So, no matter what you do online, it is important that you consider what kind of trail you are leaving, and how you want others to judge you.

With all of the above in mind, what is my view, as your Headmaster and leader of the Scotch community, about the incidents reported in the press over the last couple of weeks that will no doubt continue to be reported on both interstate and in WA? Let me share six key thoughts with you. 

1. We can always do things better at Scotch and we should always aim to be the best we can be. This includes me.
2. We must prioritise respect for all people with whom we come into contact, especially women. This is simply is non-negotiable. This means we must set exemplary standards regarding how we treat others and how we make them feel. This is guided by our thoughts, our deeds and our words whether verbally, written or digitally articulated. This is what respect truly means.
3. Schools such as Scotch must lead the way with regards to educational programmes, which address what is appropriate behaviour for all of us and what is acceptable within a modern and developing society.
4. At Scotch, we will continue to do what is within our control, that is, to provide contemporary educational programmes that address the type of behavior acceptable in the wider community. Our educational programmes can be enhanced through new content and reassessing which years to teach particular topics. As a result of the recent incidents, we have completed an initial Pre-Kindergarten to Year 12 review of the many programmes we offer covering wellbeing and socio-emotional behaviour. A new schedule is currently under development. The review committee will be chaired by our Director of Wellbeing Mr Hindle and comprise of our three sub-school Heads, and will seek input from relevant staff and students. As a result of our initial audit, we will now deliver some of our current programmes earlier in Senior School and increase the number of regular seminars offered in Years 11 and 12.
5. At Scotch, our philosophy is that we always operate under an agenda of continual improvement. The review and updating of the curriculum, academic and non-academic, is integral to ensure we continue to remain contemporary and meet social challenges.
6. If any student, or their family at Scotch feels that respect, consent and how we treat each other and those who study, visit or work on our campus, or with whom we come into contact with on weekends or at any time outside of school, is not important, then they simply have no place in our community. Failure to adhere to our expectations will result in me having no hesitation in asking non-supportive members why they should continue to be a part of the Scotch community.

Every person, no matter what gender, sexual orientation, socio-economic status, school background, or cultural heritage, has the right to be shown respect at all times.

As a progressive Independent boys school, we are only one source of such education for our young men. We are fortunate to have very caring and supportive staff, families and Old Scotch Collegians who provide our students with love, support and guidance.

In conjunction with our immediate College community and the broader society, we will continue to strive to have a positive impact on each and every student. By addressing social issues with the correct level of focus, we will continue to graduate all of you as men of sound character with a values framework which you can call upon through life. Our goal is to help you make correct decisions, based on the education you have received while at Scotch and from the people who have acted as role models and provided guidance, both inside and outside the classroom.

The development of values, morals and role models, including most of a student's broader socialisation, starts with the family unit. It is the congruent partnership of support between home and a school that will truly make a difference in the formation of our young men. As I have already highlighted, at Scotch we are very fortunate to be surrounded by incredible families who support our College's goal to prepare boys for life. Simply getting a Year 12 ATAR, VET or International Baccalaureate credential is not the whole picture. It is your formation as young men that will truly make a difference to you, many years after leaving Scotch College.

In closing I want you to remember two key points from my address:

1. Every person, no matter what gender, sexual orientation, socio-economic status, school background, or cultural heritage, has the right to be shown respect at all times by everyone associated with our College. Anything you do with, or to a fellow person, whether inside or outside of the school, must have their direct consent. It is not good enough for you to assume or pretend that you have someone's permission and consent. Let me reinforce to you again, if you think this is too hard or you disagree with my position, then you are simply enrolled at the wrong school.
2. Finally, our College, and you as individuals will be judged and labelled based on any member of our College community who chooses to disregard our behavioural standards, and, in turn, fails to demonstrate respect. We will be judged by the high standards we hold and promote, and when members of our community behave inappropriately, then, as Headmaster, I will act accordingly, as I have done for 11 years and will continue to do so as long as I am leading this community.

This speech was delivered at Assembly on Friday 5 March 2021 by Headmaster Dr Alec O'Connell.